The “Easy” Way Out

roxyandremybirth

**This is a lengthy post**

So this isn’t going to be your typical super cute and perfect birth story full of professional vibrant dramatic photography and dainty cute details. This birth story will have camera phone pics and plenty to read. I personally find birth stories to be a bit meh and I am not really interested in them. As with the last two pregnancies, birth stories were requested. Since a lot of people have been wanting me to gush about the details of the twins birth, I decided to share (after I said I wasn’t going to share).  So here it goes…

Part 1: Rainbows and Sunshine…well and Rain

So we will fast forward time to the week of April 23rd. I had a visit with my regular Ob and we skipped the usual weekly NST for a 3D/4D session to see the girls and get a few pics. This is something routine that my OBGYN does once you hit week 32 of pregnancy free of charge. It was a rainy day so I figured I would wear my pink Hunter rain boots and just wear pink in general because it is my favorite color.

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I felt great and full of energy! I had been nesting my ass off and everyone basically kept telling me to sit down and rest. But, for some reason I was like no everything is filthy! I need to clean! I need new decorations for the living-room! I need to clean behind the stove! All kinds of nonsense that newborn babies don’t care about after they are born and get to come home.

The appointment went well. My Dr rechecked measurements etc. We had been seeing the specialist frequently because it was said that Remy (Babe B) was measuring significantly smaller than Roxy (Babe A). When you have twins, you see both a regular OBGYN and a specialist. During the final weeks of pregnancy, you see the regular OBGYN on a Monday or Tuesday and the specialist on a Thurs or Friday. So these weekly visits were a pain in the ass because of the commute and the co-pays. I didn’t care as long as my babies were getting the best care possible.

On April 26th, I saw the specialist and I had been having a lot of “Braxton Hicks” contractions. Now, I have a high pain tolerance. So really in reality these lil petty Braxton Hicks contractions were actual labor contractions. Everything checked out good with the girls and they updated their “weight” and measurements and said that Baby A was over 4lbs and Baby B was 4lbs even. They noted my discomfort. The specialist reiterated that my goal was to make it to 34 weeks. If you don’t know much about twin pregnancies, typically twins are born naturally between week 34 and 36 of pregnancy.

The specialist asked if I wanted her to check my cervix for dilation. I declined because to me it wasn’t that bad. That evening, the discomfort got a little worse and I had to start timing the contractions. I followed the guidelines and my beau kept asking if we needed to go to the hospital. The contractions were every 7mins and were consistent for 1-2 hours. They spaced out and I went to sleep. Now let me throw this out there, the rate they were coming it was load and go time per the doctors requests, but I didn’t want it to be a false alarm. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday came and went and finally Monday April 30th was here and it was time to see my regular OBGYN again. Now this day, things were different. My beau had to work and he has only missed TWO of my OBGYN appointments ever in the history of me being pregnant. I am not talking just this pregnancy. He has only missed TWO appointments total for all 6 of our pregnancies. So this made visit number 2 that he was going to miss due to work. So all of Sunday I noticed how low my belly had dropped. Even my best friend said something about it while we were video chatting. I was still having contractions and I kept telling him I had a bad feeling about Monday’s visit.

Part 2: Adding Fuel To The Fire

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So here I am on Monday April 30th. Little did I know this would be my last front porch pregnancy pic and that I had a fire spreading down below. Early that morning before my beau had to leave for work, we had a little sexy time (TMI LOL) because he was scheduled to work a 48 hour shift. My beau asked if I was sure about having sexy time before we bumped pee pees, and I was like “yeah it won’t do any harm”, totally thinking with my vagina and not my brain.  I didn’t take the kids to school because of how early my appointment was. Some days the kids had to be checked out early in order for me to make my appointments, and on some days I had to just keep them home because of schedule conflicts. Both of their teachers were very accommodating of this.

Communication is key. It truly does take a village to raise children and my village is  pretty legit. On this day, my mom was the designated baby sitter. Since I was just going to the regular OB for an NST, I threw something on really quick. While I was applying my moisturizer, I noticed that my nose had spread….ALOT. Now from previous experiences, whenever my nose spread, I knew it was almost time to have a baby. As you can see in the pic, I was at the point in my pregnancy where not even maternity clothes fit properly. My shirt was snug and kept rolling up on one side, my feet were swollen so I lived in flats and flip flops and I felt like I was about to bust out of my leggings. I didn’t look like total crap so all was good to be seen out in public.

I dropped the kids off and headed to the dr. My beau told me to keep him updated and that he would have his phone on him. My beau is a firefighter so he does not always get to keep his phone on him. Due to the situation and the fact everyone knew it was any day now that the twins could be born, they made an exception. The entire drive I was having contractions. I finally reached the dr’s office and parked in the parking garage. As I was walking, I had to take a few breaks because the contractions got kind of spicy. Once inside I checked in and was quickly called to the back. While I did my usual pee in the cup routine, I noticed there was pink spotting after I wiped. Once I got into the NST room, I let the nurse know. She hooked me up and we started talking about make up and shopping. I had a few contractions during the conversation and she noticed. She then said, let me go get DR. Cohen. The doctor came in and she looked at the NST paper and she said, “hmmm, I don’t see any contractions on here but it’s obvious you are having them.” She looked at the little thingies they place on your belly to monitor things and she noted that the medical assistant had them placed in the wrong spot, so ofcourse it wasn’t picking up shxt on the monitor. She then unhooked me and told me she wanted to check my cervix because of the spotting. She stepped out, I took my bottoms off and she came back in. She checked me and all I heard her say was hmmmm. I saw it all over her face. I immediately knew what time it was. She took off her gloves and told the nurse to call over to L&D and tell them I was coming over. She looked at me and said, “You are 4-5 centimeters and baby A is really low. You need to go to L&D like right now.”

Just great. I knew it. I got dressed and waddled out the room and was met by my other OBGYN (who delivered Kendall) and he was smiling. He said, “you aren’t leaving the hospital pregnant and congrats.” I immediately called my beau and he didn’t answer the first time. So I continued on my way to my car. I was having contractions still and had to stop walking a few times. Oddly enough I was very calm. I called him a second time and he didn’t answer. I was at my SUV when he called me back and he immediately knew what I wanted. He informed me he had went ahead and put the bags in the car the night before so don’t worry about needing anything or taking them inside. He wasn’t at the fire station, they were out on a pre-plan. He informed them of what was going on and they immediately returned back to the fire station.

I had to drive around the corner to get to L&D, which felt like a road-trip when you are having back to back contractions. There was like no parking in the parking garage where the women’s center is. I ended up having to park where the physicians park and when I exited the parking deck, I was a little ways away from where L&D is. So I started my trek up the sidewalk, stopping whenever I had a contraction. I was less than half way there when a gardener on a golf cart stopped. He asked if I wanted a ride because I looked like I was in a lot of pain. I hopped on and it was like the bumpiest ride ever on the sidewalk. He got me to the front door of the women’s center but on the wrong level. L&D was on the second level. I walked in and saw the steps on my right and thought great….the old guy at the desk got my attention, and he said, “Okay sweetheart you aren’t taking the steps, go to the left and take the elevator to the 2nd floor”. I got to the second floor and checked in. I hadn’t pre-registered at all like I have in the past because I forgot to be honest. The receptionist told me it was okay and started checking me in. She asked the typical questions and quickly got me checked in. They initially took me to the triage side and the nurse told me they weren’t sure what the plan was because they were waiting on my doctor to call or come over. I sat in triage for about an hour and finally hubby had got there.

I was then moved to regular L&D. Once I was in a room, the nurse informed me that my doctor wanted an IV started and that they were going to give me a round of steroids and some medications to “stop” the labor. My doctor and the specialist came into the room and told me the plan and said we will go from there etc. As time went on my contractions intensified. I kept progressing. The labor did stall here and there but the meds were not totally stopping it. I was not given magnesium, which I was very happy about that because magnesium sucks. Shifts changed and the other OBGYN who would be on call came in. Dr. Bills is the owner of the practice that I go to. He came in and told me basically we weren’t delivering the babies today (April 30th) but we were stalling the labor until tomorrow around 2pm when I would be given the second dose of the steroids to mature their lungs. We went to bed.

The next day, I was still having contractions and moving along. They were painful but I still was managing them. I noticed my brows looked horrible so I asked hubby to grab my cosmetic case, mirror etc so I could do my make up a little. I also did my makeup to kill time and to take my mind off of the contractions

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I was checked and was at 7cm. I was then moved to another room. Now if I was having a single birth, I would have stayed in that room until I had the baby. When you have twins you have to deliver in the operating room in case an emergency arises and a c section is needed or if you are getting a c section in general.  So here we were 33 weeks pregnant and it was D-day!

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They began giving me the instructions for surgery just in case we needed to go that route. At this point the contractions were super spicy and I was not smiling, talking much or in a happy mood anymore. They were hurting pretty bad.

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A little time passed and then the nurse came in with the anesthesiologist and I was given an epidural. You HAVE to get pain medication in case you need a c section.  My birth plan was a vaginal delivery. Up until this point I had labored on my own naturally which I was proud of. I have given birth naturally several times so I knew what to expect pain wise etc. My OBGYN was okay with the vaginal delivery even though Baby B was breech. Because of her size it wouldn’t be complicated and either she would flip, they would flip her, or she would easily be delivered breech.

Part 3: The shxt got real and my birth plan went out the window. Mom Life Is The Best Life Right?

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Although I knew a C-section was a possibility we had a better chance than most of not needing one. However, there were some logistical issues. There were several mothers having multiples at the same time. The OR was being used back to back. The problem for me was the fact that we were shooting for a vaginal birth with twins and my water had broken. When it became time to push, I would need to be moved across the hall to the OR…Because of the number of mommies coming in for c-sections (scheduled and emergency) I wasn’t really a priority room wise because I was laboring on my own, so essentially  if an emergency were to happen where I needed surgery we wouldn’t be in the right room or have access to it right away if another surgery was in progress etc. My OBGYN made the call that a c-section was best to eliminate all of the what ifs and possibilities of getting the short end of the stick. Initially I was disappointed but then I was relieved because I knew it would be over with sooner rather than later and it would get the babies here as safe as possible. My OB was also a bit disappointed but I was very thankful for his professionalism and him being concerned about me and my babies’ safety.

we thought the c-section would happen later on…

 

WRONG! The nurse asked Dr. Bills when were we going to do the c-section he said 5pm as he walked out of the room.  We immediately got dibs on the OR. We looked at the clock and the nurse exclaimed, “That’s 10 mins from now!” My hubby was told to suit up and I had to remove all of my jewelry and piercings.

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Things happened so fast. I was numb, I was crying, I was scared, I was nervous, I was worried, I was excited, I was cold as hell….I was all over the place emotionally. 20 mins later Roxy was born, followed by Remy 1 minute later. Hubby got to see the babies and he took pics. Dr. Bills asked me about my prior consent for a tubal and I told him to go ahead and take the whole transmission if he wanted to. If you missed what I just said, I got my tubes tied. Yes my beau got a vasectomy and it was successful but I got my tubes tied for ME.

Now since I am sure people are really wondering about this, let me explain ONE TIME ONLY….I got a tubal because…

1. My insurance covered it 100%

2. I know I do not want anymore kids period and have no desire to ever be pregnant again

3. It represented me closing this chapter of my life

4. Antonio Cromartie..If you don’t know who he is, Google it.

5. It’s my damn body and I can do what I want with it!

I also requested a pathology report to confirm that my Fallopian tubes were in fact what was removed. BECAUSE, round ligaments look very similar to Fallopian tubes and they can be confused. Now I consented to a tubal only IF I needed a c-section. So that part of my birth plan went right lol. Mom Life is the Best Life but I am done with the pregnancy life.

Now back to the babies. At 33weeks, our babies are considered to be premature. I only got a quick peek of each baby before they were quickly taken away. Hubby got a few pics of them while they were being examined and prepped for the NICU immediately after birth.

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Both of our girls were breathing on their own and did not need oxygen. The little nose thingy helped them breathe room air without straining etc. If you look at the pictures, you can see it was not hooked up to anything. The steroid shots really helped them in this case. They were also no where near the projected weights they had estimated. And also Remy wasn’t THAT much smaller than Roxy. Aside from being born a few weeks early, our girls have no significant health issues.

Part 4: This Sucks

Once I was moved to the other area after the surgery, I felt like I needed to puke. I wasn’t in any pain but still numb. I fell asleep briefly and then was moved upstairs to my recovery room. I hadn’t seen the babies and was very exhausted. The pain medication was doing its’ thing so I ended up having some juice, water, and crackers and then I went to sleep. The next day, I was able to get out of bed and the nurses helped me go pee on my own for the first time since the surgery. Walking right after feels so weird. The pain was horrible though. After I was able to move around, the gas started (which is a good thing. You are aware of this if you are a c section mama). A few hours passed, I had a full meal and was feeling better since I could move but still needed a good bit of pain meds.

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I had to pee 3 times on my own before they removed the IV. Once that was removed I was given a wheel chair that stayed in my room for the 4 days that I was there to go back and forth to the NICU. My beau and our friends who came to visit had a little too much fun playing with my wheel chair and wheeling me around.

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I saw the babies in the NICU the day after I had them on May 2nd. I was able to hold them and my beau changed their diapers. We didn’t stay up there long because I started to feel a decent amount of pain again and wanted to go lay back down.

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Where they were in the NICU, you weren’t allowed to take pics unless your phone/camera was placed inside of these clear sterile baggies so the pics aren’t the clearest. (they have since been moved to a different part of the NICU).

My OBGYN gave me a belly binder to wear in the hospital which a lot of doctors don’t do that. If you ever have a c section it wouldn’t hurt to ask for one during your stay if they can provide you one. I stayed in the hospital a total of 4 days (with the option of a 5 day stay but 4 was enough for me) and then I went home. The other bundles of mayhem haven’t met the twins in person yet, but they have seen lots of pics and we have video chatted with them while we visit so they can see them live. I picked something comfy I already had in my closet to come home in since I didn’t get the chance to order what I had planned to wear. I also had planned on getting my hair done beforehand and that didn’t happen either.

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I was able to comfortably slip on my Bellifit Girdle which helped with the discomfort. I have had this girdle for a while and have used it after my previous 3 births. The girdle can be worn after vaginal or cesarean deliveries.  It provides more support than the binder; but for some a regular binder may be more comfy afterwards versus a full on girdle. 31947338_1657027697680474_2197663619229941760_n

Even though I had to leave the hospital without my babies, I am very happy that they are being cared for in one of the BEST NICU’s in Georgia. We get to see them whenever we want. The c-section wasn’t really ideal, but it wasn’t the worst thing in the world. It def helps to prepare yourself mentally and know what to expect beforehand. Being educated about the surgery helped me a lot. I got a lot of good information from other moms and from doing my own research.

It is just odd to me that some mothers say that c-sections are the “easy way out”  when it comes to giving birth. Being someone who has done it all (medicated, unmedicated, and now c-section), I can say that it is by far not the easiest way out. If anything to me, it is the most inconvenient/convenient way to give birth. While I am not happy about the extended down time, I am thankful and humbled by the experience. The c-section has made me more patient, and also given me a much needed period of rest that I have not had in a long time. The girls being in the NICU is allowing me to fully heal and rest without having to meet the demands of caring for two newborns (at the moment).

Some have messaged me and commented that they feel bad for me etc. This is so annoying. No need to feel bad or sorry for me because there is nothing to feel bad/sorry about. I am not sorry that I gave birth via c-section to two (although premature) babies who are pretty healthy. The goal and priority since day one was to have healthy babies. My body did its’ job well. Some people haven’t said the right things but mean no harm and some are just plain insensitive as hell. The type of personality I have, I can be pretty mean…so for the most part I just haven’t responded much to comments because I don’t want my replies to be taken the wrong way. Yes, I am pretty irritable because of everything that is going on.  I am human and need time. I know once they are home, I will be pretty much healed and ready to hit the ground running. Plus I already have a cool tattoo in mind for my scar.

 

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4 thoughts on “The “Easy” Way Out

  1. Mia Stafford says:

    I dont know why i cried a little reading this but i did lol. I think its because of how everything went and the c section and all having to leave them im the NICU. I am a c section mama so i understand every part of that. I am so glad you shared your story on your blog. 😉 see you guys soon!!

    Like

  2. _sparklesandsippycups says:

    I admire your strength and courage to even share your story of the birth of your girls. My favorite part was the explanation of getting your tubes tied and doing it for you. Mom life is the best life and you do a wonderful job! Stay encouraged, your babies are doing wonderful and makes me so happy to see.

    Like

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